boys boys boys
Have I talked at all about the dating situation here at my school? Well…let’s see… the word ‘dire’ comes to mind. Along with ‘hopeless’ and ‘nonexistent.’ No, seriously, it’s 88% female. So when my mom and I were walking back from a bar on Saturday night– which made me feel like kind of a badass, actually, even though it was 8:30 on a Saturday night and the only drink I had was a Shirley Temple, and, oh yeah, I was with my mom— anyway, we didn’t have any boys to talk about.
So we turned to the only dating pool I have left:
Here are a few options we came up with and our…. varied opinions on them.
Robert Downey Jr.
me: Ooooh. He’s just scruffy enough and he has those crinkly eye-corners that I like. And he looks really good in glasses.
Mom: He’s too old, and his face looks too soft. And on Perez Hilton he was named one of Hollywood’s most frequent trouble-makers. He’s a loser.
me: No he’s not, here, I’ll show you a picture. ….aaaaand that’s a mugshot. Anyway.
(singer of Art Brut)
Me: Yes, always, yes, forever.
(guitar/ “stage craft” of Art Brut)
Me: What? No. That would be like dating Gumby.
Me: Adorable. I’ve had a crush on him ever since I saw him in K-Pax when I was, like, ten.
Mom: Adorable, but way too old for you. And isn’t he gay?
Me: DO NOT TELL ME. I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW.
Me: (incoherent babbling)
Me: …I just really like Vulcans.
…needless to say, I am not getting very far on any of these relationships.
Who are your celebrity crushes? Yay for comments! (hint, hint)